Country Wine Part 2; Playing With The Toys We Collect. Sometimes even when others are watching.

Another of my favourite auction biographies, as a first English edition from the French original

COUNTRY WINES AND THE "WAYS AND MEANS"; THE BOOKS THAT TELL US "HOW"

PART TWO; A 1953 FIRST EDITION OF "COUNTRY WINES," BY MARY AYLETT

     THE FOLLOWING QUOTATIONS HAVE BEEN TAKEN, FOR THE PURPOSES OF THIS FEATURE ARTICLE, FROM THE 1953 FIRST EDITION, OF THE BOOK, "COUNTRY WINES," BY MARY AYLETT, FIRST PUBLISHED BY ODHAMS BOOKS OF ENGLAND. I FOUND THIS WONDERFUL LITTLE TEXT, IN A SECOND HAND SHOP IN GRAVENHURST, ON THIS PAST SATURDAY. HOW MANY OF YOU REMEMBER HAVING A SWIG OF DANDELION WINE? GRANDMOTHER'S ELDERBERRY WINE? A LOT OF THOSE OLD TIME RECIPES, HANDED DOWN THROUGH THE AGES, HOMESTEAD TO HOMESTEAD, HAVE BEEN LOST. THEY WERE TAKEN TO THE GRAVE BY THE MAKERS, WHO DIDN'T WRITE THEM DOWN. COULD YOU TAKE THE DANDELIONS ON YOUR LAWN THIS SPRING, AND MAKE, WHAT IS SURELY CONSIDERED AN EYESORE AGAINST GRASS, INTO A BEAUTIFUL AFTER DINNER WINE? THERE WAS A TIME, AND I REMEMBER IT, WHEN THIS IS EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED. I HAVE CONSUMED DANDELION WINE, AND IT WASN'T TOO BAD. OF COURSE, I HAD A CHILD'S PALATE WHEN I TRIED IT; AS SNUCK FROM A FRIEND'S HOUSE, WHEN HIS FATHER ACCIDENTALLY LEFT HIS WINE CELLAR UNLOCKED.
     "THERE ARE ALMOST AS MANY WAYS OF MAKING WINE AS THERE ARE PEOPLE TO ATTEMPT IT: HARD AND FAST RULES ARE IMPRACTICAL AND UNNECESSARY. IF WINE CANNOT BE MADE ONE WAY, TRY ANOTHER; IF PART OF THE EQUIPMENT IS TOO COSTLY, OR SOME INGREDIENT NOT AVAILABLE, IF ONE PROCESS TAKES MORE TIME THAN YOU HAVE AT YOUR DISPOSAL, THERE IS ALWAYS AN ALTERNATIVE. A DETERMINED BUT CAREFUL WINE-MAKER, CAN USE THE MOST UNLIKELY IMPLEMENTS AND GET AWAY WITH IT, PROVIDED A FEW SIMPLE RULES, WHICH WILL BE DEALT WITH IN THE NEXT CHAPTER ARE OBSERVED."
     MARY AYLETT (SEE YESTERDAY'S BLOG FOR PART ONE), WRITES IN HER CHAPTER, "WAY AND MEANS," THAT "MAKING WINE IS, IN SOME WAYS, RATHER LIKE RAISING A FAMILY: THE INDIVIDUAL HAS A CERTAIN AMOUNT OF CONTROL, BUT IT IS OF DIRECTION RATHER THAN CREATION. IF CERTAIN THINGS ARE DONE, LIFE BEGINS, IN WINE AS IN PROCREATION; IT IS THEN FOR THE DIRECTOR TO MAKE OR MAR THE LIFE THAT HAS COME INTO EXISTENCE. IN BOTH CASES IT IS THE DESIRE OF A SET OF MICRO-ORGANISMS TO INCREASE AND MULTIPLY THAT SETS UP THE CHAIN OF REACTIONS WHICH WE CALL LIFE. SOME PEOPLE ARE NATURALLY INDIFFERENT TO THIS FASCINATING PROCESS, OTHERS FIND IT OF ABSORBING INTEREST, AND THESE LATTER ARE THE MORE LIKELY TO BECOME ENTHUSIASTIC WINE MAKERS. DO NOT, THEREFORE, PUT YOURSELF TO GREAT EXPENSE TO ADAPT YOUR CIRCUMSTANCES TO A LONG CAREER OF WINE MAKING, DO NOT TURN THE SPARE ROOM INTO A LABORATORY, THE KITCHEN INTO A STILL-ROOM, OR THE GARAGE INTO A BREWERY, UNTIL YOU ARE QUITE SURE THAT THE MATTER IS TO BE OF ENDURING INTEREST TO YOU. WHEN YOU ARE SO CONVINCED, YOU WILL BE PREPARED TO SPEND TIME, MONEY AND TROUBLE ON WHAT WILL BE A LASTING PLEASURE, BUT IT WOULD BE A MISFORTUNE IF A PRELIMINARY FAILURE SHOULD MAKE YOU REGRET THE AMOUNT OF MONEY TOO HASTILY SPENT. ADAPT YOUR ORDINARY LIVING CONDITIONS AND KITCHEN EQUIPMENT UNTIL YOU KNOW WHAT YOU ARE ABOUT, FOR ONCE THE PASSION FOR MAKING WINE HAS YOU IN THRALL, IT WILL NOT LIGHTLY LET YOU GO."
     THE AUTHOR NOTES, "THERE ARE MANY TYPES OF WINE AND BEER AND EACH VARIES FROM THE OTHER IN STRENGTH AND QUALITY, NOT ONLY IN KIND, BUT WITH EACH SEPARATE BREWING. THIS VARIATION IS CAUSED BY A THOUSAND SMALL DIFFERENCES IN DEGREE, IN THE SPECIES OF GRAIN OR FRUIT, THE PREVAILING WEATHER CONDITIONS DURING GROWTH, THE TEMPERATURES UNDER WHICH THE FRUIT IS PICKED AND FERMENTED, THE SPEED OF THE FERMENT, THE SOFTNESS OR HARDNESS OF THE WATER IN USE, AND THE TYPE OF SWEETENING WHICH IS ADDED. ALL ALCOHOLIC DRINKS CAN BE ROUGHLY DIVIDED INTO WINES AND BEERS, AND AFTER THAT INTO MILD OR BITTER, SWEET OR DRY, RED OR WHITE, STILL OR EFFERVESCENT. EACH BREW SHOULD BE MADE TO PLEASE THE PALATE OF THE MAKER, AND THERE THERE CAN BE NO DISAPPOINTMENT. IF YOUR FRIENDS DO NOT APPROVE, YOU CAN DRINK IT ALL YOURSELF. NO GOOD HAS EVER COME OF ATTEMPTS TO BE ALL THINGS TO ALL MEN; MASTERPIECES ARE CREATED FROM THE BRAINS AND HEARTS OF INDIVIDUALS, AND NO WINE LOVER WILL HESITATE TO AGREE THAT A FINE WINE CAN BE REGARDED AS AMONG THE MASTERPIECES OF CREATIVE ART.
     "NATURE MAKES WINE AND BEER EVERY DAY, ABOUT THE FIELDS AND ORCHARDS. THESE ARE THE NATURAL HABITATS OF THE YEASTS THAT DO THE ESSENTIAL WORK, BUT NATURE DOES NOT CARE FOR REFINEMENT, HER ONLY OBJECT BEING TO SEE THAT HER YEASTS ARE PROVIDED WITH SUSTENANCE AND THAT THEY BREED VIGOROUSLY. MAN HAS IMPROVED UPON HER WORK WITH MANY SUBTLETIES AND LONG EXPERIENCE, BUT THE WISE BREWER, UNLIKE THE SCIENTIST, IS CAREFUL TO WORK ALWAYS WITH HER, TO SUPPLEMENT AND ENCOURAGE HER ACTIVITIES, AND NOT TO IMPEDE THEM. NATURE'S WINE IS CRUDE AND HARSH, TURGID AND OFTEN ACRID; MAN'S WINE SHOULD BE VERY DIFFERENT. HIS, WHEN FINISHED, AND MATURED, SHOULD BE SWEET OR DRY BUT NOT SOUR. IT SHOULD BE CLEAR, BRILLIANT, DELICATELY COLOURED AND AGREEABLY SCENTED, WITH ENOUGH OF ALCOHOL TO PRESERVE THAT SCENT AND COLOUR AND TO STIMULATE THE DRINKER; BUT IT MUST BE THE RIGHT ALCOHOL, NOT WOOD SPIRIT OR FUSEL OIL, CRUDE, RAW AND INDIGESTIBLE, INDUCING HEADACHES AND SOUR STOMACH, TAINTED MOUTHS AND EXACERBATED TEMPERS, ON THE MORNING AFTER ITS CONSUMPTION. SUCH GOOD WINE NATURE WILL GIVE YOU, IF YOU TREATE HER WITH RESPECT AND CONSIDERATION, FOR IT COMES OF ITSELF IF THE RIGHT PROPORTION OF INGREDIENTS IS USED, AND A SIMPLE FERMENT IS ALLOWED. SCIENTIFIC METHODS OF DISTILLATION, CHEMICAL FERMENTATION AND VIOLENT CLARIFICATIONS UPSET THIS NATURAL BALANCE; THEY PRODUCE WINES AND SPIRITS WITH A KICK LIKE A MULE, SO DEAR TO THE HEART OF THE INDUSTRIALIST AND THE CHEMIST, BUT THE NUTRITIVE VALUE OF THE WINES AND BEERS, WHICH ARE SO IMPORTANT TO MAN, IS LOST IN THE PROCESSING." DOES THIS SOUND FAMILIAR? AH, THE AGE OF PROCESSED EVERYTHING.
     THE AUTHOR CONTINUES, " IT MUST NOT BE FORGOTTEN, HOWEVER, THAT HOME-MADE WINE IS ALCOHOLIC LIQUOR; BECAUSE IT IS LIGHT AND PLEASANT TO THE PALATE, SMOOTH AND WITHOUT THE SHARP TASTE OF SPIRITS, THOSE UNACCUSTOMED TO IT ARE APT TO DISCOVER TOO LATE THAT IT IS QUITE EASY TO INDUCE WITH IT THAT DISAGREEABLE FORM OF MALNUTRITION KNOWN AS DRUNKENNESS, THOUGH IT IS LESS LIKELY TO HAPPEN WITH PROPERLY MADE WINES THAN WITH COMMERCIAL ONES, FOR THEY ARE MORE SATISFYING THAN THE LATER AND DO NOT ENCOURAGE THE DESIRE FOR EXCESS. THE MAKING OF SOME SORT OF ALCOHOLIC BEVERAGE FOR THE ALLEVIATING OF THE NASTY, BRUTISH, SHORT LIFE OF MAN, IS OF AN ANTIQUITY SO REMOTE THAT ITS ORIGINS ARE QUITE LOST TO US. AS SOON AS MAN COULD SCRAWL READABLE SIGNS ON THE WALLS OF HIS CAVE, HE WROTE IN PRAISE OF DRINK. PROBABLY THE FIRST DISCOVERIES OF PRIMITIVE HUMANITY, THE FIRST STEPS THAT HE TOOK AWAY FROM THE LIFE OF A BEAST, WERE THAT HE COULD CREATE FIRE WHERE THERE WAS NONE, THAT HE COULD CULTIVATE GRAINS, HERD CATTLE, AND FERMENT FRUIT. THE MALTING OF GRAINS IS SUCH A COMPLICATED PROCESS THAT ONE WOULD IMAGINE IT TO BE THE PRODUCT OF AN ADVANCED STATE OF CIVILIZATION, BUT THIS IS NOT SO. AS SOON AS THERE ARE RECORDS OF MAN, THERE ARE INDICATIONS THAT HE DID SO MALT GRAINS AND MAKE BEER; EVEN THE COMPARATIVELY SIMPLE VINIFICATION OF THE GRAPE IS OF NO GREATER ANTIQUITY. IN EUROPE, FROM THE EARLIEST OF TIMES UNTIL WELL INTO THE NINETEENTH CENTURY, THE GREATEST PART OF THE WINE AND BEER CONSUMED BY THE PEOPLE, WAS MADE AT HOME. BEER WAS BREWED QUARTERLY IN COTTAGES, AND ONCE A MONTH IN THE GREAT HOUSES; WINE WAS MADE AS EACH INGREDIENT CAME INTO SEASON, IN THE COTTAGE KITCHEN OR THE STILL-ROOM OF THE MANSION, AND STORED UNTIL IT WAS MATURE. WINES WERE AN IMPORTANT PART OF THE DOMESTIC PHARMACOPOEIA, AND THEIR MEDICINAL QUALITIES WERE UNDERSTOOD AND HIGHLY ESTEEMED.
     "BAKING AND BREWING WERE ESSENTIAL PARTS OF THE EDUCATION OF EVERY GIRL, OF WHATEVER DEGREE, AND MANY MEN WHO HAD A TASTE FOR THE BUSINESS, WOULD TAKE THE LATTER PART OF THE DOMESTIC DUTIES ON THEMSELVES. CERTAIN MEN AND WOMEN GAINED LOCAL FAME FOR THEIR WINES AND BEERS, AND INNS AND ALE-HOUSES RELIED FOR THEIR PROSPERITY ON THE ABILITIES OF THE PROPRIETOR. THE STANDARDS WERE IN CONSEQUENCE KEPT HIGH, FOR IT WAS USELESS TO ATTEMPT TO SELL BAD BEER OR WINE TO CUSTOMERS,, NOT BY L WHO KNEW AS MUCH ABOUT MAKING AS THE BREWER HISELF, AND WHO COULD SPEAK THEIR MINDS POINTEDLY WHEN THE PRODUCT WAS NOT UP TO THE REQUIRED LEVEL. THE ELIZABETHAN HOUSEWIFE MADE WINE FAR MORE COMMONLY THAN SHE MADE JAM, WHICH WAS THEN CONSIDERED AN UNWHOLESOME PRESERVE, COSTLY BECAUSE OF THE PRICE OF SUGAR, AND FIT ONLY FOR THE PALATES OF CHILDREN, WHO WOULD ONLY BE MADE SICK AND CROSS BY AN OVER-INDULGENCE IN MUCH CONFECTIONARY. WINE, HOWEVER, WAS AN ESSENTIAL. ELDERBERRY IS A SPECIFIC AGAINST COUGHS AND COLDS IN THE WINTER, COWSLIP IS FOR INSOMNIA, CELERY IS USED AGAINST THE GOUT AND RHEUMATISM, PARSNIP AS A LAXATIVE, HERB WINE AS A CARMINATIVE, AND ALL AS A NECESSARY ADJUNCT TO THE PREVAILING SPIRIT OF HOSPITALITY. TO CALL AT THE HUMBLEST COTTAGE, AS A SHORT TIME AGO, AS FIFTY YEARS, WAS TO BE SUPPLIED AT ONCE WITH WINE AND SWEET CAKE, IN EXACTLY THE MANNER DESCRIBED BY JANE AUSEN IN 'EMMA,' WHEN THE POVERTY-STRICKEN MISS BATES, IS CALLED UPON IN THE MORNING. IN THOSE DAYS THERE WAS SELDOM ANYONE SO POOR IN THE COUNTRY THAT THEY COULD NOT PRODUCE THIS ESSENTIAL OF SOCIAL INTERCOURSE. IT IS NOT TO BE DOUBTED THAT MISS BATE'S WINE WAS OF HER OWN MAKING, THOUGH THE CUSTOM WAS EVEN THEN IN DECAY AMONGST THE WELL-TO-DO.
     "THE FIRST SEEDS OF DISSOLUTION OF THIS SIMPLE BUT WHOLESOME REGIMEN WERE BROUGHT INTO ENGLAND BY CHARLES II AT HIS RESTORATION OF THE THRONE. THE COURT HAD LITTLE RESPECT FOR ENGLISH IDEAS AND CUSTOMS AND NO REGARD AT ALL FOR COUNTRY LIFE. WITH CHARLES FIRST CAME THE NOTION THAT THE ARISTOCRACY WERE A CLASS PRIVILEGED TO DO NOTHING AT ALL BUT AMUSE THEMSELVES, AND THE CITY WAS THE PLACE TO PROVIDE SUCH AMUSEMENT. SUCH AN IDEA WAS UTTERLY FOREIGN TO THE NATIVES OF THE COUNTRY, BUT IT WAS SO AGREEABLE TO THOSE WHO WERE ABLE TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT THAT IT SPREAD GRADUALLY THROUGH THE WHOLE OF SOCIETY, UNTIL WE SEE ITS FINAL FRUITS TODAY, WHEN MEN FIGHT EACH OTHER WITHOUT SCRUPLE FOR MONEY, SO THAT, WHEN THEY HAVE GAINED A SUFFICIENT QUANTITY OF IT, THEY MAY BE IDLE FOR THE REST OF THEIR LIVES. SUCH PRINCIPLES WERE BOUND TO LEAD TO A DECLINE IN ALL TYPES OF RURAL ACTIVITY, FOR FASHION, AS IT IS TRULY SAID, ALWAYS RUNS DOWNHILL. BEFORE THE END OF CHARLE'S OWN CENTURY, IT WAS CONSIDERED SMART AND AMUSING FOR A FINE LADY IN A PLAY TO SAY CALMLY, 'I NAUSEATE WALKING; 'TIS A COUNTRY DIVERSION. I LOATHE THE COUNTRY AND EVERYTHING THAT RELATES TO IT."
     THE AUTHOR CONCLUDES, "GOOD WINES HAVE BEEN MADE IN THE PAST, NOT BY LEARNED MEN OR BRILLIANT SCIENTISTS, BUT BY SIMPLE PEASANTS LIVING IN WHAT WE CHOOSE TO CONSIDER POVERTY AND IGNORANCE. THESE PEOPLE HAD A VITALITY AND AN INTEREST IN THEIR LIVES WHICH IS NOTICEABLY LEAVING US; THE WORDS 'BOREDOM,' IN ENGLAND AND 'ENNUI' IN FRANCE ARE MODERN INVENTIONS, NEWLY COME INTO FASHION WITH PROGRESS, AND INDUSTRIAL REVOLUTION, AND THE DEAD AND UNNATURAL UNIFORMITY OF SCIENTIFIC CIVILIZATION. SUCH A STATE OF MIND IS INDUCED BY ABSTINENCE FROM ALL TRULY CREATIVE ACTIVITY AND FROM THE REPRESSION OF THE INDIVIDUAL TASTES AND TALENTS. ONE IMMEDIATE WAY OF COMBATING THE EVIL, OF AROUSING OURSELVES FROM THE LETHARGY INTO WHICH WE ARE FALLING, IS TO MAKE AND TO DRINK OUR OWN GOOD, WHOLESOME WINES. PERHAPS UNDER THEIR STIMULATING INFLUENCE WE MAY FEEL A DESIRE TO PARTICIPATE IN OTHER MORE DIFFICULT ARTS. THE REVIVAL OF SUCH FEELINGS MIGHT BE OF ADVANTAGE NOT ONLY TO OURSELVES, BUT TO THE WHOLE COMMUNITY IN WHICH WE LIVE. HOW CAN WE KNOW UNTIL WE HAVE TRIED?

TO HAVE AND TO HOLD - AN OLD TOY - NO KIDDING

ARE COLLECTORS OF TOYS THE HAPPIEST OF ALL? JACK WAS!

A FEW DAYS AGO, ANDREW WAS LEAVING THE HOUSE, ON THE WAY TO A MUSIC GIG, AND HE GOT ALL NOSTALGIC. HE TURNED BACK TOWARD THE HOUSE, DESPITE THE BLOWING SNOW, BENT OVER, AND PULLED AN OLD HOT WHEELS CAR, OFF A SMALL WOODEN LEDGE HIS MOTHER USES FOR HER GERANIUMS IN-SEASON. "I REMEMBER THIS ONE," HE SAID, POLISHING THE FINISH OF THE CIRCA 1980'S TOY CAR. "I HAD LOTS OF ONES LIKE THIS," HE RECALLED, SHOWING ME THE CAR I REMEMBER DIGGING UP THE SPRING BEFORE, WHEN WE DECIDED TO PUT IN THE BORDER GARDEN. "IT MUST HAVE FALLEN THROUGH THE DECKING OF THE OLD PORCH," I REMINDED HIM. "I FOUND IT WHEN I STARTED CLEARING OUT THE LEAVES, FOR THE GARDEN. I THINK THERE'S MORE OF THEM IN THE SHED." HE LOOKED AT IT FROM ALL ANGLES AND THEN SET IT BACK ON THE LEDGE…..WHICH MUST HAVE BEEN HEAT-BREAKING FOR THE LITTLE CAR, TO HAVE FINALLY BEEN RECOGNIZED BY ITS FORMER OWNER. IF IT HAD A SOUL! RIGHT? WELL, THERE ARE SOME FOLKS WHO FEEL PRETTY STRONGLY ABOUT THEIR TOY COLLECTION, AND THE REASONS YOU NEVER, EVER NEGLECT THEM……..AND IT'S NOT JUST A LINE FROM THE MOVIE "TOY STORY" EITHER.

ONE DAY WHEN WE HAD COMPANY, HERE AT BIRCH HOLLOW, VISITOR REMARKED ABRUPTLY ABOUT HOW MANY TOYS ANDREW AND ROBERT HAD……AND THAT THEY MUST BE THE LUCKIEST KIDS EVER, TO HAVE SO MANY THINGS TO PLAY WITH. IT WASN'T THE FIRST TIME I'D HEARD THIS, BUT ON MOST OF THE OTHER OCCASIONS, I OVERHEAD THE COMMENT, IT CAME FROM VISITING KIDS, AND EVEN MY PARENTS, WHO GREATLY CONTRIBUTED TO THE TOY VOLUME. BUT AS I'VE WRITTEN ABOUT, PREVIOUSLY, SUZANNE AND I RESPECTIVELY, DIDN'T COME FROM FAMILIES THAT HAD A LOT OF EXTRA MONEY TO SPEND ON TOYS. WE HAD NATURE. SUZANNE GREW UP IN ONE OF THE MOST PICTURESQUE COMMUNITIES IN MUSKOKA, AND THEIR FAMILY RAN THE WINDERMERE MARINA. FROM A VERY YOUNG AGE, SUZANNE WAS WORKING IN THE UPSTAIR'S SNACKBAR, KNOWN AS "THE SKIPPER." SHE WENT FROM BEING A KID TO BEING A SNACKBAR COOK IN ONE OPPORTUNITY-FILLED BUSINESS DECISION. IT'S NOT TO SUGGEST SHE DIDN'T HAVE DOLLS AND DOLLHOUSES, AND A JUNIOR SEWING MACHINE, OR DOZENS OF GAME-BOARDS. WHILE I WAS STILL PLAYING WITH A TABLE-TOP HOCKEY GAME, SUZANNE WAS MOTORING AROUND THE LAKES IN HER OWN WOODEN BOAT. IT'S LIKE THAT WHEN YOU OWN A MARINA, A COTTAGE, AND A HOUSE WITHIN A WHISKER OF THE LAKE. SHE HAD ACRES OF FOREST TO PLAY IN, AND I HAD URBAN OPEN SPACES LIKE BAMFORD'S WOODS AND THE GROVE. I DIDN'T NEED A TOY AT ALL, TO ENJOY THE NATURE AROUND ME. BUT IF YOU HAD TOYS, YOU WERE MY NEW BEST FRIEND.

AS I DIDN'T HAVE A LOT OF TOYS MYSELF, I MADE SURE THE FRIENDS I HUNG AROUND WITH, WERE FULLY EQUIPPED FOR MY PLAY INTERESTS. BUT WHEN ANOTHER FRIEND OF THE FAMILY SUGGESTED, "YOU MUST BE MAKING UP FOR WHAT YOU DIDN'T HAVE YOURSELF, AS A CHILD," IT DID RING A BELL. I KNEW OF ANOTHER ANTIQUE DEALER, YOU SEE, WHO BOUGHT A LOT OF VINTAGE TOYS FOR HIMSELF, BASED ON THE FUNDAMENTAL ARGUMENT, HE WAS FINALLY GOING TO HAVE, WHAT HE WAS DENIED AS A KID. IT'S NOT A VERY COMPELLING OR SENSIBLE ARGUMENT, WHEN IT COMES RIGHT DOWN TO IT, BECAUSE THE VINTAGE TOYS HE WAS REFERRING, WOULD COST A LOT OF MONEY TO RE-PURCHASE.

THERE WOULD BE THOSE WHO WOULD ARGUE, THAT IT WOULDN'T MATTER, IF YOU HAD EVERY TOY YOU HAD EVER WANTED AS A CHILD, BECAUSE THE CHILD-LIKE SPIRIT, THE INNOCENT, EMERGING IMAGINATION TO ENJOY THEM, WAS NOW GONE. DRIED UP. NEVER TO BE FOUND AGAIN. "YOU CAN NEVER GO BACK," IS A STATEMENT I'VE ALWAYS DESPISED. AS AN ANTIQUE DEALER I'VE KICKED THIS OUT OF MY WAY FOR MOST OF MY PROFESSIONAL LIFE. OF COURSE I CAN GO BACK. AS A WRITER, I'VE HAD TO DO THE SAME THING, TIME AND AGAIN, BECAUSE AS AN HISTORIAN PARTICULARLY, I'M ALWAYS "GOING BACK." AS FOR BEING ABLE TO RETURN TO YOUTH, THAT'S KIND OF BODILY THING, REQUIRING A FOUNTAIN OF YOUTH. AS FOR OUTLOOK AND ATTITUDE, FRANKLY, I DON'T PAY ANY ATTENTION TO THOSE WHO ARGUE, WHETHER OR NOT, I CAN RETURN TO THE DAYS OF MY YOUTH. I POINT OUT TO THEM, "YOU MIGHT BE RIGHT, THAT YOU CAN'T GO BACK, BUT IT DEPENDS ON IF YOU EVER REALLY LEFT IN THE FIRST PLACE." I NEVER DID. ASK SUZANNE. THE BOYS. I'M WANDERING AROUND BIRCH HOLLOW WITH MY OLD HOCKEY JERSEY ON, AS IF WAITING FOR THE BIG CALL, TO RE-JOIN THE HERALD-GAZETTE RINK RATS. I HAVE THE BEST DARN TIME WRITING ABOUT MY YOUTH, GROWING UP IN BRACEBRIDGE, THE OLD GANG OF MINE UP ON ALICE STREET, AND THE THOUSANDS GAMES OF TABLE-TOP HOCKEY WE PLAYED FOR THE MINIATURE PLASTIC STANLEY CUP. I CAN RESORT TO CHILDISH FOLLY IN ONLY MINUTES, OF READING THE DAILY NEWS. I MAY GIVE THE APPEARANCE OF BEING SERIOUS, BUT THAT'S ONLY BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE A TOY CAR IN MY HAND AT THE TIME. IF I'M BEING A PAIN IN THE ARSE, ALL ARGUMENTATIVE AND STUFF, JUST HAND ME A VINTAGE CORGI AND I'LL LICK YOUR HAND. A CORGI, DINKY TOY, AND A HOT WHEELS, AND I'LL JUMP INTO YOUR ARMS.

I'M A CONFESSED ART-LOVER, AND IT'S QUITE TRUE THAT AS A COLLECTOR, I HAVE GONE OVER-BOARD. NOT JUST THIS YEAR. THIS HAS BEEN A MULTI-DECADE EXCESS. SO YOU'D THINK I'D BE OUT OF MY MIND WITH HAPPINESS, AT HAVING SO MUCH ART AT MY BECK AND CALL. TRUE. BUT I'D BE EVEN HAPPIER TO HAVE ROOMS FILLED WITH VINTAGE DINKY TOYS AND CORGI VEHICLES, AND BOXES OF HOT WHEELS TO LOOK AFTER. SO I THINK, TO JUMP BACK UP THIS BLOG, TO THE COMMENCEMENT OF MY LITTLE TOME, THAT UNQUESTIONABLY, SUZANNE AND I DID OVER-EXTEND OURSELVES WITH ANDREW AND ROBERT, SO THEY COULD HAVE WHAT WE DIDN'T AS KIDS. WE STILL HAVE SEVENTY PERCENT OF THEIR TOYS BOXED-UP AND READY TO BE RE-PLAYED WITH, IF AND WHEN THEY PROVIDE US WITH GRAND-KIDS. I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU, A TRIP TO GRANDMA AND GRAMPS WILL BE AN ODYSSEY OF TOYS. WE MUST HAVE A MILLION PIECES OF LEGO AROUND HERE. BUT IN HONESTY, AND AS A FORMER MR. MOM FOR MOST OF THEIR YOUNG LIVES, I WAS GREATLY AT EASE DOING THIS JOB…..ADMITTEDLY A DIFFICULT ONE, SIMPLY BECAUSE I WASN'T FAR OFF BEING A KID MYSELF…..A CHARACTERISTIC I'VE NEVER LOST. AS I LOVED TO WATCH THE BOYS BUILD THEIR ELABORATE TOWNSCAPES, WITH HUNDREDS OF TOY CARS, AND A NEAT VINTAGE SERVICE CENTRE, I GOT JUST AS MUCH PLAY-TIME AS THEY DID……AND I MAY HAVE, ON OCCASION, SNUCK DOWN TO PLAY WITH THE CARS, WHEN THEY BOTH NODDED OFF FOR AN AFTERNOON NAP. SUZANNE CAUGHT ME PLAYING WITH CARS ONCE BUT I TOLD HER IT WAS NOT GROUNDS FOR DIVORCE, SEEING AS I DIDN'T HAVE A FEMALE PLAYMATE OVER. I THINK SHE'D TRUST ME WITH THE FEMALE PLAYMATE, JUST NOT THE TOYS.

I HAVE A GREAT DEAL OF RESPECT FOR VINTAGE TOY COLLECTORS. I HAVE KNOWN QUITE A FEW IN MY TIME AS AN ANTIQUE DEALER, AND THE BIRCH HOLLOW LIAR'S CLUB USED TO HAVE A LOT OF IN-DEPTH DISCUSSIONS ABOUT COLLECTING TOYS AND SUCH. JACK KIERNAN, THE RIGHTFUL PRESIDENT OF THE LIAR'S CLUB, A WONDERFUL OLDTIMER, WHO LOVED TO COLLECT HIS TOY CARS AND TRUCKS, COULD TALK TO INFINITY ABOUT HIS INTERESTS, SPECIFICALLY IN DINKY TOYS, MATCHBOX, LESNEY AND CORGI. HE APPROACHED IT FROM TWO DIRECTIONS. HE HAD A PERMANENT COLLECTION THAT WAS NON-NEGOTIABLE. HE WOULDN'T SELL FOR ANY PRICE. (UNLESS HIS OWN CAR BROKE DOWN, AND HE NEEDED A GRAND OR SO TO FIX IT UP). OTHERS HE FOUND, WHILE HUSTLING OUT ON THE ANTIQUE HUNT. HE'D PATIENTLY AND CAREFULLY CLEAN THEM UP, APPLY A REPAIR IF NECESSARY, RESEARCH EACH CAR OR TRUCK, THROUGH THE DOG-EARED PAGES OF HIS GNARLED PRICE GUIDES, AND THEN PUT THEM UP FOR SALE IN OUR SHOP. THAT'S WHEN I REALLY GOT TO PLAY WITH TOYS. JACK WAS FLEXIBLE THIS WAY. 'WE'RE YOU PLAYING WITH THE TOYS AGAIN TED," HE'D ASK, SEEING THE SMILE ON MY FACE, WHEN HE'D COME IN FOR A VISIT. "OF COURSE JACK….YOU CAN'T IGNORE A TOY THAT WANTS TO BE PLAYED WITH."

JACK WAS ABUNDANTLY PATIENT WITH ME, AS A ROOKIE TOY COLLECTOR, AND HE'D SPEND HOURS GOING THROUGH PRICE GUIDES AND REFERENCE MATERIAL, SHOWING ME THE DINKY TOYS THAT WERE OF EXCEPTIONAL VALUE, FOR SPECIFIC REASONS, SUCH AS PAINT COLOR. HE EXPLAINED THAT IT WAS OFTEN THE CASE, A PAINT COLOR WAS CHANGED ON A CAR IN PRODUCTION, DUE TO A SHORTAGE OR A COMPANY SHIFT OF OPINION. WHAT IT WOULD MEAN THEN, IS THAT THERE WERE DIFFERENCES IN VALUATIONS. OUT OF 10,000 MADE, THERE MAY HAVE BEEN A LOT FEWER DONE OF ONE EXPERIMENTAL COLOR, THUS THE VALUE WAS MUCH HIGHER FOR THESE CARS OR TRUCKS. HE WAS JUST SO DARN ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT COLLECTING, AND WORKING ON HIS OLD TOY CARS. HE HAD RETIRED FROM KODAK CANADA, I BELIEVE, AND SETTLED WITH HIS WIFE IN THE VILLAGE OF BAYSVILLE, ONTARIO. HE'D COME IN TO SEE ME AT LEAST ONCE A WEEK, AND WE TALKED ABOUT POLITICS AND THE CRAPPY BUSINESS PRACTICES OF LENDING INSTITUTIONS. HE WAS AN AVID READER AND KNEW WHAT WAS GOING ON IN THE WORLD. THE HAPPIEST JACK COULD GET IN A DAY, WAS FINDING A NEAT TOY CAR, OR A DOZEN, WHILE HUNTING THROUGH THE REGIONAL SECOND HAND SHOPS. HE COULDN'T WAIT TO GET IN TO THE SHOP, TO SHOW ME HIS LATEST FINDS. JACK, WHETHER HE KNEW IT OR NOT, ACTUALLY INSPIRED TWO OTHER MEMBERS OF THE BIRCH HOLLOW LIAR'S CLUB, TO START COLLECTING OLD TOYS. IF EVER A TOY HAD A DEFENDER, IT WAS JACK KIERNAN. IF EVER A TOY NEEDED SOMEONE TO PLAY WITH IT, JACK WAS USUALLY ON-CALL. HE TAUGHT ME SOMETHING ABOUT COLLECTING, I'D NEVER REALLY THOUGHT ABOUT……AND THAT WAS THE INVESTMENT OF IMAGINATION. I MEAN, I USE IMAGINATION CONSTANTLY AS A WRITER, BUT AS A COLLECTOR? HOW SO?

A COUPLE OF TIMES I SNUCK-UP ON JACK AS HE WAS TESTING OUT THE WHEELS OF A NICE VINTAGE CORGI, OR DINKY TOY, AND I MUST ADMIT, WONDERING WHAT WAS GOING ON IN HIS HEAD. HE ACTUALLY HAD DIVORCED HIMSELF OF THE ADULT WORLD, I THOUGHT, AND IT WAS AS IF A CHRISTMAS MORNING, AND THE VEHICLE HE WAS PLAYING WITH, HAD COME FROM SANTA'S BAG. THAT'S HOW INTENSE HE WAS, CHECKING OUT THE WHEEL BALANCE, AND THE SMOOTH RIDE, AND BEING FASCINATED BY THE HIGH QUALITY OF THE TOY'S MANUFACTURE. IF THERE WAS A SMUDGE, HE TOOK CARE OF IT. HE'D PULL A LITTLE CLOTH OUT OF HIS JACKET POCKET, AND HOLD THE CAR UP TO THE LIGHT, SO HE COULD POLISH THE FINISH BACK TO A HIGH LUSTER. WHEN HIS WIFE WOULD COME INTO THE SHOP, TO FETCH HIM FOR THE TRIP HOME, SHE'D COME AROUND THE CORNER, AS JACK WAS MODELLING HIS LATEST FIND, AND SAY, "IS JACK SHOWING YOU HIS TOYS AGAIN TED." "AS A MATTER OF FACT, HE IS," I'D HAPPILY RESPOND. "BUT HE WON'T LET ME PLAY WITH THEM," I COMPLAINED. "PLAY FAIR JACK," SHE'D KID HIM. "HE GETS SMUDGES ON THEM DEAR," HE'D SHOOT BACK. THEY WERE A NICE COUPLE. I ALWAYS LOOKED FORWARD TO THEIR COMPANY. BUT IT WAS JACK'S ENTHUSIASM FOR HIS COLLECTION THAT SET THE BAR FOR MY OWN COLLECTING INTERESTS. HERE WAS THIS RETIRED GUY, WHO COULD HAVE DONE SO MANY OTHER THINGS WITH HIS LIFE, LIKE TRAVELING THE WORLD, BUT THEY BOTH SEEM TO ENJOY THEIR TIME POKING AROUND MUSKOKA…….MAKING INTERESTING FINDS IN THE SECOND HAND AND THRIFT SHOPS, FROM ONE END OF THE REGION TO THE OTHER. ALL THE VENDORS KNEW JACK. THEY ALL KNEW WHAT HE LIKED, WHAT HE WOULD PURCHASE, AND IT WASN'T UNCOMMON TO HEAR ONE OF THE BUSINESS OWNERS SAY, "IF YOU SEE JACK, TELL HIM I'VE GOT A BAG OF DINKY TOYS SET ASIDE." WE DID THAT FOR ONE ANOTHER BACK THEN.

JACK JOINED IN WITH ME AND THE WEE LADS, TO COLLECT HOCKEY AND BASEBALL CARDS, BACK IN THE HALCYON DAYS OF THE EARLY 1990'S. GEEZ DID WE EVER HAVE FUN, BUYING AND TRADING CARDS…..AND EVEN SELLING A FEW NOW AND AGAIN. ONCE WE GOT A BOOTH AT A LOCAL CARD SHOW, AND WE MADE ABOUT TWO BUCKS EACH. IT WAS A LAUGH ANYWAY, JUST BEING INVOLVED. HE WAS ALWAYS SO ENTHUSIASTIC ABOUT THIS STUFF, AND HE MADE OUR TIME TOGETHER SO DARN MEMORABLE. EVEN THOUGH HE COULD BE A TAD GRUFF IF HE WAS HAVING A BAD DAY, WHICH USUALLY HAD SOMETHING TO DO WITH THE MECHANICAL WORKINGS OF HIS REAL CAR, HE COULD SALVAGE AN OUTING WITH A LITTLE TOY CHAT…..REFERRING TO SOMETHING HE MAY HAVE READ ABOUT SOME SHOW THAT WAS UPCOMING, AND HE WANTED TO ATTEND. ALL I KNOW, IS THAT HE LOVED DOING THE COLLECTING-THING, AND I DON'T THINK IT EVER BROKE THE BANK, OR THAT IT EVER MADE HIM, IN ANY WAY, OBSESSIVE ABOUT ACQUISITION. HE HAD A CHILD'S DISPOSITION, AND HE TREATED THOSE OLD, WELL USED TOYS, WITH THE GREATEST RESPECT. IF SOMEONE HAD TOLD ME, THAT A TOY COLLECTOR LIKE JACK KIERNON, COULD CHANGE MY LIFE IN THE ANTIQUE PROFESSION, I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN BOTHERED TO ANSWER. I LIKE ART. OLD BOOKS. PRIMITIVE PINE. AND OH YES, OLD TOYS. OF COURSE JACK INFLUENCED ME. I SURRENDERED ABOUT A WEEK AFTER I MET HIM.

WHEN WE CLOSED UP THE STORE IN THE MID 1990'S, AFTER I ACCEPTED A PUBLIC RELATIONS JOB, WITH THE CROZIER FOUNDATION, IT WAS HARD TO BID JACK ADIEU. ALTHOUGH WE BUMPED INTO EACH OTHER OFTEN AFTER THIS, IT JUST WASN'T THE SAME. I MISSED HIS TUTORIALS. I MISSED THE NEWS ABOUT HIS LATEST, GREATEST FINDS. WHEN I READ HIS MEMORIAL IN THE WEEKLY NEWS, A SHORT TIME AFTER, I WAS JUST STUNNED. I DROPPED THE PAPER IN MY LAP, AND JUST SAT THERE, AS IF A CORNERSTONE OF MY PROFESSIONAL LIFE, HAD JUST BEEN KICKED AWAY. JACK WAS A MENTOR. A LOAD-BEARING MENTOR. A COLLECTOR I DEPENDED ON TO ANSWER ALL MY DINKY TOY, CORGI, AND HOT WHEELS QUESTIONS. HE WAS THE GUY WHO HAD TOLD ME, IN NO UNCERTAIN TERMS, THAT IT WAS PERFECTLY MATURE, AND ADULT-LIKE, TO LAPSE INTO PLAY WITH TOY CARS. HE WAS MY ADULT-YEARS PLAY DATE, WHO COULDN'T BE REPLACED. ALL I KNOW, IS THAT JACK HAD TRULY ENJOYED HIS RETIREMENT PRE-OCCUPATION. HE RESCUED A LOT OF DAMAGED TOY VEHICLES, CLEANED THEM UP, DID MINOR REPAIRS FROM THE SALVAGE OF PARALLEL JUNKER VEHICLES, AND WAS SO PROUD TO SELL THEM IN OUR SHOP. HE WAS A PARTNER IN THE OLD TOY BUSINESS. I LOVED THE GUY.

I'M NOT AS INTENSE A COLLECTOR AS JACK KIERNAN. FEW OF US COULD MEASURE UP TO HIS DEDICATION TO OLD TOYS. HE DIDN'T HAVE A LOT OF MONEY TO SPEND ON THESE ITEMS, BUT HE WORKED LONG AND HARD SEEKING THEM OUT, AT FLEA MARKETS AND SHOPS FROM ORILLIA TO HUNTSVILLE, AND SOMETIMES BEYOND. HE ADORED THE ANNUAL BAYSVILLE WALK-ABOUT, A SUMMER SEASON STREET SALE, WITH MANY PARTICIPATING ANTIQUE VENDORS. HE MAY HAVE EVEN HAD A BOOTH AT ONE POINT. I KNOW HE TALKED ABOUT IT. THEY WOULD HAVE KNOWN JACK THAT'S FOR SURE. BET THEY'D HAVE LITTLE BOXES AND BAGS SET ASIDE FOR HIM TOO. HE WAS JUST THAT KIND OF PERSON, YOU WANTED TO DO BUSINESS WITH……BECAUSE BY GOLLY, IT WAS ALWAYS SO MUCH PLEASURE. HE TALKED THE TALK, AND HE WALKED THE WALK.

WHENEVER I'M OUT ON THE HUSTINGS, AND I SEE A LITTLE COLLECTION OF OLD TOYS, A FEW HOT WHEELS, MAYBE A DINKY, MATCHBOX, LESNEY OR CORGI, I NOT ONLY THINK OF JACK…..WELL SIR, I BUY THEM IN HIS MEMORY. MY GRANDCHILDREN ARE GOING TO LOVE TO PLAY WITH THESE TOY FINDS. I'LL FIND A WAY OF INSERTING A LITTLE STORY INTO THEIR PLAY-DAY, ABOUT THE OLD FELLOW I USED TO KNOW……WHO LOVED HIS CARS AND TRUCKS! THANKS JACK. I NEVER GOT TO SAY GOODBYE……HOPEFULLY THIS MESSAGE, FROM ONE OLD FART TO ANOTHER, WILL FIND YOU IN GOOD HUMOUR, UP THERE IN THE GREAT BEYOND, UNDOUBTEDLY REGALING SOME KINDRED SPIRIT, ABOUT THE NEAT OLD CARS AND TRUCKS OF ONCE……UPON A THOROUGHLY FULFILLED, PLAYFULLY CELEBRATED LIFETIME.

A FEW YEARS AGO, WHILE BROWSING THROUGH A SECOND HAND SHOP, HERE IN GRAVENHURST, I FOUND A LITTLE PIECE I KNEW HAD ONCE BELONGED TO JACK. I KNOW SO, BECAUSE IT STILL HAD THE PRICE TAG ON IT, THAT I PUT THERE, WITH JACK'S APPROVAL. IT WAS A LITTLE PLAQUE, WITH VARIOUS MINIATURE "CEREMONIAL SWORDS," MOUNTED ON IT…..WITH IDENTIFICATION WRITTEN BELOW EACH. HE LOVED THAT LITTLE PIECE, AS I RECALL NOW, BECAUSE TO HIM IT SEEMED AN ODDITY……SOMETHING YOU DIDN'T SEE AROUND THE ANTIQUE SHOP CIRCUIT. NOT A RARITY BECAUSE IT WASN'T RARE. NOT SOMETHING A HOME DECORATOR WOULD SEEK OUT, BUT POSSIBLY SOME KID WOULD THINK WORTHY TO HANG IN A BEDROOM…..AS A MOOD SETTER. WHO KNOWS. WHEN I SAW THE LITTLE PLAQUE, STUFFED INTO THE DISCOUNT BIN OF THIS SHOP, I HAD TO BUY IT AS A REMEMBRANCE OF JACK KIERNAN. EVEN AFTER MANY YEARS, AND THE BOYS HAVING BEEN VERY YOUNG AT THE TIME, THE WHOLE FAMILY, EVEN MY MOTHER (WHO HELPED AT THE STORE), REMEMBERED IT AS "JACK'S PLAQUE."

"DON'T GET ALL SENTIMENTAL ON ME TED," HE'D SAY, WITH A TWINKLING EYE, AND TRADEMARK GRIN. "NO CHANCE OF THAT JACK; IT'S JUST CLOSING TIME. SEE YOU SOON."