CHRISTMAS IN GRAVENHURST WITH STUART MCLEAN'S VINYL CAFE - WHAT A NICE BOOST FOR THE OPERA HOUSE AND US!
WITH A NEW ROOF HOW ABOUT A NEW ATTITUDE?
I HOPE THAT ONCE THE ROOF RESTORATION IS COMPLETE, AND THE OPERA HOUSE IS TRIM AND FIT AGAIN, WE WILL SEE A MORE AMBITIOUS PROGRAM OF ENTERTAINMENT IN 2013. ONCE AGAIN, I'M GOING TO PITCH THE IDEA OF CREATING AN OPERA HOUSE LIAISON COMMITTEE. A HUGELY ENERGETIC GROUP TO BE MADE UP OF KEEN CITIZENS, WHO WANT…..NO, INSIST ON CONSERVING, UPGRADING, MAINTAINING, AND BY ALL MEANS POSSIBLE, USING THIS OUTSTANDING, HISTORIC MAIN STREET THEATRE VENUE FOR WHAT IT WAS INTENDED. TO BE A HELL OF AN EXCITING PLACE, IN THE CENTRE OF THE GOOD OLD TOWN. AND OF COURSE, BE THE BEST THAT IT CAN BE, AS AN ECONOMIC BOOSTER, IN OUR UPTOWN BUSINESS COMMUNITY. SHOW ME THE BOOB WHO WOULDN'T WANT THIS DEGREE OF SUCCESS……AND I'LL SHOW YOU SOMEONE WHO HAS NEVER BEEN TO THE OPERA HOUSE.
HAVING STUART MCLEAN'S ANNUAL CHRISTMAS EDITION OF THE "VINYL CAFE," AT THE OPERA HOUSE, FOR TWO DAYS IN NOVEMBER, IS AN ENDORSEMENT YOU CAN TAKE TO THE BANK. I'M SURE THAT'S BEEN DONE, BECAUSE THE SHOWS HAVE ALREADY SOLD-OUT. NOW THAT'S IMPRESSIVE. VERY EXCITING BUT NOT UNEXPECTED, BECAUSE THE LEGENDARY CANADIAN STORY-TELLER, HAS THIS HAPPEN ALOT AS HE CRISS-CROSSES CANADA…..ESPECIALLY DURING THE LEAD-UP TO CHRISTMAS. JUST HAVING HIS NAME UP ON THE MARQUIS MAKES US LOCAL YOCALS FEEL PRETTY GOOD ABOUT OURSELVES. WE HAVEN'T HAD A LOT TO CHEER ABOUT RECENTLY, AND WE'VE BEEN GETTING PRETTY FED-UP WITH OUR OWN COMPANY…..SO HAVING A GUEST LIKE MR. MCLEAN TAKES THE HEAT OFF OUR SOCIAL INTERCOURSE.
I WAITED TOO LONG TO BUY TICKETS FOR THE SHOW, AND BY GOLLY, I FOUND OUT SOMETHING ABOUT MY BRIDE OF MANY YEARS…..I HONESTLY HADN'T KNOWN. SHE'S NOT AS FORGIVING IN HER MORE MATURE YEARS. I USED TO GET AWAY WITH A LOT OF STUFF EARLY IN OUR MARRIAGE, LIKE STAYING OUT ALL NIGHT WITH THE LADS, AFTER LATE-NIGHT SHINNY, AND CLOSING THE LOCAL WATERING HOLES WITH BUDDIES, WHILE MY DINNER WAS KEPT WARM, AS A PROMISE OF MARRIAGE, BY AN EVER-DOTING WIFE. THE EVER-DOTING PART HAS COME TO AN END, IN CASE YOU WERE WONDERING. SO WHEN I HAD A CHANCE TO REDEEM MYSELF, FOR A LENGTHY LIST OF INTIMATE SHORTFALLS, AND GIVE THE WOMAN A REALLY NICE NIGHT OUT, WELL SIR, I FORGOT TO WALK ACROSS THE STREET FROM OUR ANTIQUE SHOP, TO BUY TWO TICKETS. I REMEMBERED THE PIZZA FOR LUNCH, AND PAYING THE EGG-MAN FOR THE DOZEN HE BROUGHT IN FROM THE FARM. I EVEN REMEMBERED THE BANK DEPOSIT, MAILING TWO IMPORTANT LETTERS, AND BUYING SOME STAMPS. I JUST FORGOT THE TICKETS. COME ON! YOU'VE FORGOTTEN STUFF BEFORE? LIKE FLOWERS FOR ANNIVERSARIES? DATES OF BIRTHDAYS? THAT THE SHOPS CLOSE EARLY ON CHRISTMAS EVE? I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW MANY TIMES I'VE GOT BURNED ON THIS. I'M A PROCRASTINATOR OF THE HIGHEST ORDER. AS SUZANNE NOTES, "IF IT WAS TO GET TICKETS FOR THE ARGOS, YOU'D HAVE BEEN AT THE TICKET OFFICE AN HOUR BEFORE OPENING!" THAT'S TRUE.
"YOU WOULD HAVE GOT THOSE TICKETS IF IT HAD BEEN GARRISON KEILLOR PERFORMING AT THE OPERA HOUSE," SHE BARKED AT ME, KNOWING OF MY LONGTIME AFFECTION, FOR THE AMERICAN STORY-TELLER, AND HIS AMUSING ANECDOTES FROM HIS DAYS IN VICINITY OF MINNESOTA'S LAKE WOBEGON; AND THEN THERE IS HIS RADIO SHOW, THE PRAIRIE HOME COMPANION, OF WHICH I HAVE DOZENS OF TAPES I LISTEN TO ON BITTER WINTER NIGHTS…….AS THE MUSKOKA WIND RAGES OVER THE FROZEN LANDSCAPE, ALL THE WAY FROM MINNESOTA, SOME FOLKS SAY. "THAT'S NOT FAIR TO STUART MCCLEAN, TO PIT HIM AGAINST KEILLOR. IT WOULDN'T BE A FAIR FIGHT; KEILLOR'S SEVENTY YEARS OLD, FOR GOD'S SAKE. YOU SHOULDN'T THRUST STUART INTO THE FREY, JUST BECAUSE I LIKE GARRISON KEILLOR. I LIKE THEM BOTH," I QUALIFIED, TO HER EMPTY CHAIR, THE NIGHT SHE HID MY CASSETTE TAPES SOMEWHERE IN THE GUEST BEDROOM. "I REALLY WANTED TO SEE THE SHOW," SHE REMINDED ME, AT LEAST ONCE EVERY TWELVE MINUTES, THE OTHER EVENING, WHEN SHE ASKED ME WHERE I'D PUT THE TICKETS. GEEZ, SHE HAD EVEN GIVEN ME THE MONEY TO BUY THEM. WELL, AT LEAST I DIDN'T BLOW THE MONEY ON BOOZE, OR BUYING LOTTERY TICKETS……OR OLD BOOKS, WHICH SHE JUST ASSUMES, I'LL SQUANDER OUR LAST COMMUNAL NICKLE. "I WAS BORN A BIBLIOMANIAC, SO GIVE ME A BREAK," I RESPOND, CHOKING BACK THE TEARS.
IT WILL BE A GOOD SHOW FOR GRAVENHURST……AND WE WILL BE EXCEPTIONAL CHRISTMAS HOSTS
As a family, we've been listening to Stuart McLean on CBC Radio for a lot of years. I mean that! I can remember many times, putting the car radio on, while camping in Algonquin Park, so that we'd have his stories told over a crackling fire, while Suzanne would be cooking up the eggs and bacon for a campsite breakfast. (Just before I get crucified on this one, I am forbidden to cook for our family, as I routinely hurt myself, and others, with cooking misadventures)
Andrew has worked on the technical crew for the Vinyl Cafe at both the Caisse Theatre in Bracebridge, and previously at the Opera House. Stuart is a kindly soul, and always mentions his name at the conclusion of the performance. I think he and Robert will both be connected to the Christmas program this November, depending on the technical requirements of the show. It's a gig Andrew really looks forward to, and was pretty sure he'd be able to look out from the tech-deck, and see mom and pop in the front row, beaming respect for this master story-teller. You know, it's not like I spent the money on magic beans or anything. The money is still tucked in the envelope at the shop, taunting me every time I see it, with its big white smile, all smug and self righteous. I mean, if I'd lost it playing poker, or billiards, or because of a friendly bet on the baseball playoffs, that would be one thing…..and although I'd still feel I let my wife down, it would at the very least, seem, that I had been pathetically human……and didn't make my wife's social / entertainment agenda a priority. Being forgetful is regrettable, and must clearly show the good woman, that her husband is losing his marbles. Maybe he should be put out to pasture, and never be asked to do important things, like buy theatre tickets again. I hate when she's mad at me, because I like to talk a lot, and now there's just the sound of a sewing machine being throttled in the next room……and just two cats who never talk back…..unless it's meal-time.
So here's what I'm relying on. A few years back, when Fred Schulz was managing the Opera House, the Irish Rovers were playing two back to back shows, the same night. I didn't tell Suzanne this, but I got Fred to set aside tickets for both shows. Now there is no group more alluring to my wife, other than the Dave Clarke Five, that can make her get wild and crazy. So when we got to the end of the first show, and she was getting up to leave, I made family history, by pulling her back into the seat, for the "second verse, same as the first." She said "I love you Ted Currie, you old fart. (said with an Irish accent….faaart!" Well, I could have done without the faaart part, but what the hell. She was happy, and it made my life happy as well. Adding to this little past achievement, as the doting husband, I was able to get her a back-stage pass, for the Irish Rovers when they appeared at Bracebridge's Caisse Theatre. Andrew was the sound technician, and with a little coaxing, he got his mother a free up-close-and-personal audience with her Irish heroes…..and now she has at least fifty signed records. I mean, really, how many signed records do you really need, to call it a complete collection?
Suzanne likes the Vinyl Cafe, and she has followed Stuart McLean for years and years. We listened to it this morning in fact, like we do every Saturday morning on CBC 2, while we head out on the weekend antique hunt, on the "stock for the shop," tour, to bulk-up the business we run for son Robert, in the former Muskoka Theatre Building, across from the Opera House. "Oh, turn it up dear, it's the Vinyl Cafe," she said, as we drove along through the beautiful cathedral maples, and the spiraling cascades of yellow and red leaves, gently falling along that picturesque drive along Gravenhurst's Muskoka Beach Road. "I have to listen to Stuart McLean on the radio….because I missed getting tickets to his show…..you know the one he's doing four blocks from our house?" "Yes dear," I answer, like good husbands the world over, when they're neck deep in the trouble they stirred up from thin air. By just being God's "guys", we can get into so much trouble, trying to remember things, like buying Opera House tickets, to see Stuart McLean.
So I had this idea. You remember the Carol Burnett Show, when at the end of the program, the old char-lady starts mopping up the stage…..but it's really Carol? So I thought, for the show, Suzanne could get a volunteer gig with a pail and mop, and heck, see Stuart McLean for the price of some basic tidying-up. You know something, she would have actually hit me with that frying pan she swung at me, if it hadn't been cast iron, and the fact she had a bout of tennis elbow. "Dear, Andrew and Rob will tell us all about the show anyway," I said, as she was pouring the tea into my cup…..which was precariously close to my crotch. Ah, she's a sweet girl really, and I'm a good but forgetful "faaart of a wee lad." We make quite a pair.
I hope Stuart McLean has a great two-night run here in Gravenhurst, and I know everyone who got a ticket, will enjoy themselves immensely. This may be the start of a great new modern day tradition, in show business, for the historic Opera House, which has been a little down on its luck recently, with a leaky roof, and the weather getting in some cheap shots. Hey, how about those Irish Rovers again? I could really use the good-will something like that could generate. Or if you could arrange it, the Dave Clarke Five would definitely take some heat off.
I told Suzanne that there's a good chance Stuart will wander over to the shop, while he's here in town, so she might get to meet him then. Meanwhile, I'm putting all our Vinyl Cafe books together, just in case. I'm not only a maniac for books. I'm an autograph zealot, as you might have recognized if you've visited our shop. That's pretty crass isn't it? First I miss getting tickets for the show, and then I plan to profit from his kindness when he autographs my books. I'm conflicted these days. Does it show. Must be all that political opining that's warped my perspective on things.
Thanks again, for taking a few moments to view this site. I hope you liked it enough, to visit yet another day. See you soon.
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