Monday, September 10, 2012

Sea Shell Icon At An Automotive Flea Market


IT'S TRUE WHAT THEY SAY……YOU JUST NEVER KNOW WHAT YOU'RE GOING TO FIND OUT THERE….AT AN AUTOMOBILE FLEA MARKET

ANTIQUE HUNTING IS AS UNPREDICTABLE AS THE WEATHER - JUST ASK THE VENDORS AT BURL'S CREEK

     SUZANNE IS WELL PREPARED FOR MY EXCESSES. I WAS BORN WITH THE EXCESSIVE GENE. WHEN I START SOMETHING, I'M LIKE TIM TAYLOR OF THE TELEVISION SHOW, 'HOME IMPROVEMENT." I GET CARRIED AWAY. THEN MY FAMILY WANTS ME CARRIED AWAY.
     MOST OF THE TIME, THESE DAYS, MY EXTRAVAGANCES ARE PRETTY CONSERVATIVE, COMPARED TO THE CRAZY STUFF I USED TO GET UP TO, AT AUCTIONS AND ESTATE SALES. SUZANNE AND I LAUNCHED OUR RELATIONSHIP, BACK IN THE EARLY 1980'S BY GOING ANTIQUE HUNTING, MOST FREQUENTLY AT AUCTIONS. TELL ME THIS ISN'T THE MOST ROMANTIC STORY YOU'VE EVER READ?  I COULD HAVE TAKEN HER TO PARIS (ONTARIO), OR LONDON (SAME PROVINCE) BUT SHE SAID AUCTIONS WERE FUN….AND WE WERE TOGETHER AFTER ALL. WE HAD OUR HONEYMOON IN COLONIAL WILLIAMSBURG, IN VIRGINIA, WHERE SHE HAD TO THREATEN ME WITH AN EARLY DIVORCE, IF I DIDN'T LEAVE THE HISTORIC PRINT SHOP. HEY, I'M IN THE PRINT PROFESSION. WHAT CAN I SAY? I THOUGHT SHE WANTED ME TO ENJOY MYSELF. APPARENTLY I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE HOLDING HER HAND IN THE PRINT SHOP, BUT THE INTERPRETER LET ME HAVE A GO AT BRINGING THE PRESS DOWN ONTO THE FRESHLY INKED TRAY OF PRINT. IT WAS A ONCE IN A LIFETIME MOMENT. WE HAD A LIFETIME TO WORK OUT OUR DIFFERENCES OF OPINION, ABOUT WHAT KIND OF HUSBAND I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE! THREE DECADES AND I'M STILL NOT UP TO SNUFF.
     SUZANNE REALLY 0NLY HAD ONE PROBLEM WITH ME ON THE ANTIQUE CIRCUIT. SHE COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I WOULD PURCHASE, AND MEASURE LATER. AS LONG AS THERE WAS SOMEONE IN THE AUDIENCE WHO HAD A TRUCK, I WAS READY TO PURSUE A BARGAIN WHETHER IT WAS A PUMP ORGAN OR A DINING ROOM SET, INCLUDING SIDEBOARD AND CHINA CUPBOARD. SUZANNE WOULD GASP WHEN SHE FOUND OUT HER HUSBAND HAD JUST PURCHASED SOME BEHEMOTH PAINTING, WITH NO PRE-SET PLAN ON HOW TO GET IT HOME. I WAS A VALUE BUYER YOU SEE, AND EVEN THOUGH SOME LARGE BUT SIGNIFICANT PIECE OF FURNITURE WASN'T ON MY LIST OF ITEMS TO BID ON, IF I FOUND IT SELLING FOR A RIDICULOUSLY LOW PRICE, WELL SIR, IT WAS COMING HOME ONE WAY OR ANOTHER. SHE'D LOOK AT ME AND SAY, "YOU DIDN'T?" WHAT DO YOU SAY AFTER A QUESTION LIKE THAT? "I TOLD YOU THAT MARRYING AN ANTIQUE DEALER WAS RISKY BUSINESS!" "YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT CRAZY ANTIQUE DEALER," SHE'D RETORT, WHILE USING A TAPE MEASURE TO SEE IF THE PIECE IN QUESTION WOULD FIT IN THE VAN, OR HAVE TO BE STRAPPED TO THE CARRIER ON TOP. SIDE BY SIDE THE CANOE. I'D OFTEN FIND A NEAT AUCTION ON THE WAY BACK FROM A CANOE OUTING IN ALGONQUIN.
     THERE WAS ONE FUNNY OCCASION, I MUST RECALL FOR YOU, AT THE START OF TODAY'S BLOG……IN KEEPING WITH THE PARAGRAPH ABOVE. WHEN WE ATTENDED AN AUCTION AT THE OLD DINOSAUR PARK, NOT FAR FROM THREE MILE LAKE, I WAS LOOKING FOR MEMORABILIA. SMALL, MANAGEABLE PIECES, FROM POSTERS TO PHOTOGRAPHS OF THE PARK IN ITS HEYDAY. BUT THERE WERE CONCRETE-FORMED DINOSAURS FOR SALE, AND SUZANNE WAS PETRIFIED MY AUCTION HABITS WOULD REAR-UP WHEN THEY CAME UP FOR SALE. I KNEW SHE WAS CONCERNED, EXPLAINING THE TWENTY OR SO TIMES, SHE REMINDED ME OF MY PROMISE. DO NOT BID ON THE DINOSAURS. FUNNY THING THAT PROMISE. I ALMOST DID. THE WELL CRAFTED STRUCTURES, ONE ABOUT TWO STORIES TALL, WEREN'T GETTING ANY BIDS. THIS IS A WARNING SIGN FOR ME AND MY PARTNER. SO JUST FOR FUN, AND KNOWING WHAT KIND OF REACTION SUZANNE WOULD HAVE, I GOT MYSELF INTO A TIGHT GROUP OF WATCHERS, SUSPECTING SOMEONE IN THAT GROUP WAS GOING TO BID. WHEN YOU'RE AN ACTIVE AUCTION GOER, YOU LEARN TO STUDY EVERY SINGLE PERSON AT THE SALE. IT'S IMPORTANT TO KNOW WHAT THEY'RE AFTER AND THE BIDDING HABITS THEY HAVE, AND MIGHT USE AGAINST US.
     I WASN'T WRONG. ONE OF THE AUCTION REGULARS, TO GET A LAUGH, PUT IN A BID. THE CROWD ROARED WITH A CHEER, THAT AFTER FIVE MINUTES OF BEGGING, A BUYER HAD BEEN FOUND. I WAS SO CLOSE TO THE GUY WHO MADE THE LAST MINUTE BID, THAT SUZANNE FREAKED-OUT. SHE COULD SEE MY BASEBALL CAP BOBBING UP AND DOWN, CLOSE TO WHERE THE CHAP WAS, AT THAT PRECISE MOMENT, BEING HEARTILY AND STEADILY BERATED BY HIS WIFE. SO I WATCHED HER WEAVE THROUGH THE CROWD, WITH A LOOK OF ANGER LIKE I'VE NEVER SEEN BEYOND A HOLLYWOOD HORROR FLICK. "TELL ME YOU DIDN'T BID ON THAT STUPID DINOSAUR TED CURRIE," AND "I KNEW I SHOULDN'T HAVE TAKEN MY EYES OFF YOU. ARE YOU CRAZY? WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO WITH A 7,000 POUND DINOSAUR?" BY THIS POINT, THE WIFE OF THE GENTLEMAN WHO DID BUY THE REALLY BIG DINOSAUR, TURNED TO SUZANNE, AND SAID SOMETHING LIKE, "DON'T WORRY DEAR……TODAY MY HUSBAND WAS CRAZIER THAN YOURS." I DIDN'T BUY IT. JUST WANTED TO PLAY WITH HER EMOTIONS. I DID DO SOME CRAZY STUFF LIKE THIS, AND THEN I'D TURN TO SUZANNE FOR SOLUTIONS. JUST LIKE I DID AT THE BURL'S CREEK AUTOMOTIVE FLEA MARKET, ON SUNDAY. YOU JUST CAN'T CHANGE AN ANTIQUE HUNTER FROM A LIFETIME OF EXCESSES. IT WAS EASIER TO STOP DRINKING, THAN EASING UP ON THE WEIRD PURCHASES.

TED NEEDED A WAGON, OR ELSE

     I went to the Burl's Creek Automotive Flea Market, this past Sunday, as we do twice each year, to find….you betcha, antiques. Not car related. The huge array of vendors at the three day sale, don't just represent automotive collector / dealers. While arguably they do represent the bulk of the vendors, you can find almost any type of antique and collectible you can think of, in one of those thousand vendors, stretched over many acres of former farm field. It was particularly interesting this year, because of the two serious days of inclement weather. When you're antique hunters, like our family has been for decades, you have to take advantage of adverse sale conditions. First of all, I will always take the final day of a sale, over the first or middle day. Even at an antique show. The vendors don't want to haul the stuff home if they can avoid it……and that's where we come into the mix. It was perfect for us, because it was raining and windy, when we found the beautiful memorial shadow box / diorama, at a strange little antique booth, in the middle of twenty automotive vendors, with rusty car fenders, hub caps, tires, windshields, and car advertising signs. There it was, high on a stand, at the end of his tables. An 1880's, tiny shell encrusted cross with magnificent wreathing adornments, also with applied shells, giving the appearance of a wrap-around floral display. The large glassed case, with this amazing folk art inside, weighed at least fifty pounds, and you couldn't get much of a hold on it, to walk the mile or so back to the car. Andrew took the first shift, and he couldn't even see where he was walking, which was awfully dangerous. The problem as well, was that we needed to mitigate the shaking because we didn't want to inflict any damage on the piece. It was another clear example, for Suzanne, who is undoubtedly gathering biographical material on me for a "tell-all," when I'm gone, of her husband's wild side. No, not with other women. With antiques that belong in a mortuary, more than our home or shop. I like funerary collectibles, and I would love to own a fancy, oil lamp adorned, horse drawn hearse. They didn't have one, or it would have been hauled back to Gravenhurst, if I had been forced to buy the horses to go with it!
     I looked at Suzanne with those eyes……begging her to help ease me and my boys out of another wild and whacky antique hunting dilemma. She scanned the other vendors around the booth, we had just purchased the memorial shadow box, when she bolted across the lane, where she found an old wagon next to a vehicle, being packed up early for the trip home. She asked whether the wagon was still for sale, and the gentleman asked how much she was willing to pay. Suzanne is notoriously cheap, so the guy had his work cut out for him. He could see she was a tough one, and we were in a spot, with a bagged diorama in my son's weakening arms. The bubble-caption in the cartoon, of us that moment, would have read, "Please sir, help us with your nice wagon, for a small price." "You know what," he said, in the bluster of rain and wind, "My daughter came to the sale this morning with a large number of items to sell from the booth, and I haven't sold any of it yet……so I don't have room to take the wagon home in my truck. He crumpled up the $45 price tag hanging off the handle, and told Suzanne, that $20 bucks would do it for him. Considering the piece under that covering, could be worth a lot of money, it was a good deal, and a safe ride for the piece back to the car. Add to that the small bird diorama I also bought, from another vendor down the lane, plus a bag of Robert's records he'd purchased, twenty bucks was awfully cheap for good transportation. In fact, it is now our automotive flea market designated wagon, for the next show in June of 2013. Hey, it worked out. But of course, Suzanne, as usual, came to the rescue of her husband. She always has, and that's going to be a whole chapter when I write her biography, which I will entitle, "Life With An Antique Nut."
     By the way, just in case you like a little weirdness with your blog. This is a true story, and just one more whacky connection with the paranormal……or coincidence, however you look at it!   On the way down, Suzanne and I were talking about angels and spirituality. We were listening to CBC 2 and there was some beautiful organ music being performed….which led me to the topic of angels visiting earth…..and related stories about ghosts and wandering spirits. Driving into the huge parking area of Burl's Creek, I thought to myself, "I'd like to find an icon." That might be crazy if you said to your partner, but Suzanne knows how much I like antique icons, made from a variety of materials. We had walked miles without buying anything more than a sweat-shirt for Suzanne, because she was shivering in the cold wind and rain. We decided to skip a few of the lanes, and go right to the back of the show, and cover the east side vendors. Out of ten lanes coming back, we did three. I said to Suzanne numerous times, that this was the first time to the automotive flea market, that we hadn't bumped into our boys a half dozen times along the way. We hadn't seen them since we came through the front gate. So on the final leg of the third aisle, before we planned on quitting the search for the day, we found a really neat icon…..covered in shells in a neat shadow box. I don't know how many religious icons were out there, amongst the hundreds of vendors, but it seemed pretty obvious, I was led to this historic piece, made in England circa 1880, and so were the boys. With thousands of people at the show, and many, many rows of vendors, as soon as I went to pick the display case up, Andrew and Robert were standing beside me. Of all the places to meet up. Coincidence? Of course it was. Strange coincidence? Mine always are.
     If you like antique hunting, and are willing to put some mileage on your sneakers, the automotive flea market is a truly interesting place to shop for collectibles. I've never come back empty handed yet. I will publish a graphic of the icon and its thousands of sea shells, as soon as I get it cleaned up. It will be on display at the boys' vintage music shop on Muskoka Road. Is it haunted? It found me, so it's definitely got some magnetism.
     Thanks so much for joining today's blog. Please come and visit again.

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